"Eventually all the pieces fall into place....
until then, laugh at the confusion,
live for the moment, and know that everything
happens for a reason"

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Politics and My Social Anxiety

It seems that the whole country has become obsessed with the upcoming election. Everyone is so excited and inspired by their political beliefs, which is fine and good. But, in all honesty, I'm excited for it to be over. Twelve more days people. I think I'm going to make it. 

See, it's not that I don't love our country. I do. And it's not that I don't have opinions about certain political things because I do, too. It's just that I have a high level of social anxiety. 

It's true. My social anxiety plays a major role in lots of aspects of my life. See, I really enjoy people getting along and I'll do almost anything to avoid conflict. And if you haven't noticed by now, elections don't bring out the best in people. People who I view as mild mannered and polite are now attacking others like vicious dogs. People who are mostly honest are now spewing lies about a candidate, either one, because they've heard it on TV. It all makes me very uncomfortable.

Election season is a very stressful time for me. I don't really want to talk about details of the debate with everyone and their brother, especially when I didn't watch a single one. I don't want to hear all the rumors and lies about the candidates. I don't want to fall into the trap of putting all my hopes into one person's basket. And I really don't want strangers asking me who I'm voting for. 

So, if you were to ask me if I'm excited about the election I would have to say yes. I'm excited for it to be over. I'm excited for all of the Romney/Ryan signs to be gone and those few Obama signs, too. I'm excited for the news networks to have something else to talk about. But mostly, I'm excited for people to return to their mild mannered ways and to be kind to one another again. 

That's all this socially anxious girl wants... for people to be nice to one another, love one another and not let politics ruin relationships for the sake of a petty argument. 

Love and Happiness,

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Staying In Scottsboro...

Ever since our (temporary) move back to Scottsboro people keep saying, "Don't you want to stay?"

Stay? In Scottsboro? For any of you who know me very well, you know that moving  back to Scottsboro has never been in my plan. I don't have a specific memory of when I decided that Scottsboro just wasn't for me but some where along the way I began to dream of getting out. 

"Getting out" sounds a little dramatic, as no one was pressuring me to stay. My parents always supported my desire to move away and start a life outside of my hometown. I mean, come on. They're from Michigan for goodness sake. Being nomadic must run in our family. 

And while I've always been pretty adamant about not moving back to Scottsboro, there truly are some awesome things about my hometown. The river is a part of my childhood that I've missed while I was away. The sound, the smell and the beauty of the water makes me smile and remember the good times I've spent either in Paul's boat or sitting in a swing on the bank. The parks and walking trails may not seem great to everyone who lives here, but they are so much better than where I've been. Since being back, Paul and I have spent time on 4 separate walking trails enjoying the beautiful fall weather. And for any of you who are ever passing through, Scottsboro's Taco Bell beats Auburn's and Johnson City's by a long shot. And even though I've been gone for over 4 years, they still know me by name at my local bank. It's the little things that make Scottsboro still feel like home to me.

So, when they ask me, "Don't you want to stay", my answer is still an awkward, "No".
Moving away has always been a dream for me. To start over, to depend on myself and on Paul, to experience new things, to see new places and to find the place somewhere in this world that feels like home. And somewhere down the road, where ever we end up, I hope my bank tellers will know me by name. 

Love and Happiness, 

Fall Is My Favorite

Fall is my favorite season. 

There is something about fall time that makes me so happy. The leaves are changing colors and it's getting cool outside. It's a perfect time for a bonfire and a pumpkin candle. But more importantly it's the perfect time for a college football game, preferably in Jordan-Hare. So, that's where we went a few weekends ago for the Auburn-Arkansas game. 

Now, usually a trip to Auburn is too short because those pesky jobs get in the way of a long weekend away. So, instead of rushing to fit our Auburn experience into 2 days, we stayed 4 nights. Our sweet friends, Brad and Fallon, let us stay at their house and it was great getting to see and catch up with them. We also got to catch up with other friends who are still living in Auburn. We were able to eat and all my favorite places, including Niffer's, Blue Bagel and Momma G's. We walked around campus, which has changed incredibly, and of course went to the football game. The trees at Toomer's were sad to look at but Samford was as beautiful as ever. It was a perfect Auburn experience, all except the losing the game part. 

When we left Auburn on Monday morning, we decided not to go back to Scottsboro right away and go to BODIES The Exhibition in Atlanta, which was on my bucket list. I've always wanted to go see this exhibition and it was well worth the short drive from Auburn. I've decided that I'm a huge dork and that I'm incredibly lucky to have a husband who takes me to all these weird events. 

Anyways, it was a much needed trip away for two restless people. I wish I had more to write about, but honestly things are a little slow around here. Who knows, it could be the calm before the storm or the calm before Paul gets a job! 

Fingers crossed!

Love and Happiness,

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Enjoying Life

Life was a little crazy this summer. Between buying a house, not buying a house, buying a house again, getting kicked out of our apartment, not buying a house again, packing up the house and quitting our jobs, I was a little stressed out. When we finally made it out of Johnson City, all I wanted to do was sleep.

See, I don't always handle stress very well. And after months of holding it all in, I was so relieved to know that it was all over. No more mold in the basement, no more lending agents, no more evil landlords and no more strangers walking through my home planning for their future when I didn't know mine. No more 12 hours shifts, no more early mornings and no more cleaning baseboards and sweeping behind the fridge. It was all over and it felt amazing. 

And even though it may seem odd, this past month of being homeless and jobless has been one of the least stressful months I can remember. Somehow, this girl who usually struggles with being in control and having a plan has found complete peace with the unknown. No, we still don't know where we're going to move and we obviously still don't have jobs but it's okay. It will all fall together when the time is right. 

I won't lie, I do have moments where I get nervous and wonder what the future holds for us. And I'm excited about the future because I know it's going to be incredible, whatever it is. But for now I'm going to appreciate each minute of our atypical life because there are so many parts of it that are amazing. I'm going to hangout with my family. I'm going to sleep in on a weekday with my husband. I'm going to go for a walk in the middle of the day. I'm going to catch up on tv shows that I've missed. I'm going to watch the sunset on the river and cast a line towards the bank. I'm going to watch a matinee on a Tuesday. I'm going to revel in the beauty of having no rent or power bills to pay. I'm going to enjoy my time off. 

So, that's my plan. It's a good one, don't you think?
I think so, too. 

Love and Happiness,